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View Article  Faster Ambulances

In my last post, I mentioned that I’d like to be able to show you videos of my daily life.  I can’t do that, but I can do the next best thing…

An ambulance based joke from Channel Four’s “The IT Crowd”.

You can view it by clicking here (WMV file which may not work for some users).

 

“Better looking drivers” – I love it.

View Article  Shorn

An ideal invention for the Blogger in your family would be a pair of video-recording glasses – wear them all day, and should something interesting happen the wearer presses a button to save the last 30 seconds of video to a small storage device.

If that were possible I’d now be showing you a video of a lovely young man.

I was driving along on blue lights and sirens (to an “intoxicated – feeling unwell”) just heading past Plaistow underground station, from the pavement I could hear someone shouting…

…Someone shouting, “Wanker…Wanker…Wanker…”.  He was also making the traditional hand gestures.

A quick look at him lead me to believe that he was either homeless, an alcoholic, or both.  I could see that he had no front teeth.  He only looked around thirty years old.

I slowed the ambulance so that my crewmate and I could loudly laugh in his general direction.

He turned his back on us.

He bent over.

He pulled his trousers down.

Suddenly we were confronted with a skinny white arse, and dangling between his legs were equally white and skinny testicles.

They looked shaved.

Just then a police car came over the hill.

I wound down my window and spoke to the police driver, “See that fellow with no teeth?  He just exposed himself to me”.

“The one calling you a wanker?”, asked the policeman.

“That’s the one…Have fun!”

We continued on the way to the call as best we could between tears of laughter.

It’s strange the things that make your day.

Welcome to Random Acts Of Reality, a Blog based in London, England, written by an E.M.T working for the London Ambulance Service. Also, number one search result for "Womble porn". All names have be changed to protect the guilty. This Blog was previously known as "Why I Hate Humanity" but the antipsychotic medication seems to have kicked in.

All opinions on this website are mine alone, and may not reflect those of the L.A.S or other ambulance crews

Find out more about me here.

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