You never can tell with verucas. Could go nasty at any moment.

Verucas are bloody nasty things - took me about two years to get rid of one when I was a kid!

Ah, this would explain why my daily hits have gone from 130 per day to 1,354 yesterday... Cheers Tom!

just finished off your book tom. great read, well done.
blogging books seem to be the way forward - i've just had frank chalk's book about teaching, it's your time you're wasting, also from amazon - only half way through but it's another excellent read. bloggers tell it like it is, i suspect!
keep up the very good work on the day job, too

Found a bloke lying in the street today in Cambridge. People did actually stop to see if he was ok. He appeared to have passed out. My hubby called an ambulance and was asked twice how old the bloke was and the guy at the emergency centre kept saying that he couldn't find the address on his map. This took a good few minutes. Meanwhile the bloke came round and amazingly staggered to his feet. He was very drunk!!! Eventually the guys in the ambulance turned up and appeared to be very familiar with him. Not exactly a pointless call as the bloke was very unwell. But still how many times have they been called out to this guy????

Hey Tom,

I seem to remember that about 7 or 8 years ago, one of your colleagues at Whipps Cross ambulance station was putting together a book, for charity, about all the useless/pointless/waste-of-time calls we've been called to. Don't know what became of it.

As for me, off the top of my head, I've been to:

Patient singing!
Patient who wanted to go to bed - see my post "Time for Bed"
Kiddie with an almost imperceptible cut to his finger. (just needed a plaster)
Lady with a bent wedding ring (no loss of circulation or sensation) who wanted to be taken to hospital to have the ring cut off.
Patient with blisters
Elderly gentleman who just wanted to know when his out-patient appointment was going to be.
Lady who slipped down her chair - regular caller; 4-5 times daily.
Lady who wanted her commode moved nearer the bed.
Patient who wanted help to get to the toilet.
Elderly lady who wanted a cup of tea - another regular.
..and countless soft tissue injuries of the "you called us for this???" variety.

Maybe we should collect some more and publish another book for charity.

Having just read Yiota's comment, which hadn't appeared when I started mine, reminds me of the "bloke at the bus stop" and the "young guy on the front lawn" two amusing and complete waste of time calls; however, they're good for a couple of posts on My Blog so you'll have to wait 'til I post them to find out more.

Thanks Yiota!

Those verrucas can be life threatening don't you know...just like the stubbed toe which caused breathing difficulties i attended yesterday night!

Hmmm... reminds me of the call I had last weekend. I was diverted from a "Nan-down" call at 1.30 in the morning to a child described as "floppy and lethargic with high temperature and ineffective breathing".

"Oh Poo!", I thought as I turned the truck around and headed back the way I had come, Only to be met at the doorstep by the child's mother brandishing a bottle of CALPOL and a very happy 3 year old child.

The actual reason for the call ? .... was the Calpol out of date as "mummy's little darling" had a bit of a headache.

Answer... NO!. The date you are looking at is the prescription date which was two days ago! Grrrrrr!

good grief.

Although, calpol, is bloody incredible stuff. Cures 95% of childhood, although it's fun and games getting it inside the child for the first few years.

yep i agree especially when they give you sachets to open...cue gloves, sachets, one sticky mess and about half the dose in the child!!!

Calpol cures 95% of childhood?

Goddamn.. gimme some!!

Mine was a few years ago, we were sent to a "toothache". My mate and I thought "Well, we rely on our control doctors who have triaged this call as "emergency ambulance", surely it would be blood from his mouth all around the house...

We knocked the door, a man around 30 opened it and (with perfectly speaking and no sign of pain or bleeding) directly said:
- I am.
- And... what seems to be the problem?
- My tooth aches.
- OK, come to the ambulance (as we didn't want to waste more time)
- How am I going to come back?
- Well, if you find us around, we'd be glad trying to kick your a$$ strong enough so you have another free ride (actually this was thought by us, not said)

Of course, there was a bus line from his door to the hospital. I bet this guy threatened the doctor by the phone with something like I have friends at the courts and you are going to jail if don't send me the damn ambulance! That is a real problem around here, to protect the phone triage doctors against being sued.