A lot of simple and ultimately uninteresting jobs last night, but two slightly funny things.

The first was our first call of the day - a man who had fainted in a betting shop. When we arrived we were told by the other patrons of the shop that the patient had already left. They shoved us to the door and pointed in the general direction of the busy street.

"There he is!", they shouted at us, waggling their hands in a general direction of 'outside of the shop'.

"Who?", I asked. "There are loads of people out there."

"Him - the one with the head".

I was a bit surprised by this description.

"They all have heads you silly sods!"

(We didn't find him in the end, he can't have been that ill to outrun an ambulance.)

The second started off as one of our usual types of calls, a four year old boy who had been vomiting. His mother was concerned and so we agreed to take him to hospital. As there was no other adult in the house the mother had to take the boy's sister with her.

Our patient was fine, fairly happy and no further signs of vomiting.

The sister however waited until we were within sight of the hospital before puking all over the floor of our ambulance. It seems that we are making people sick (literally) in the back of our ambulance.

I correctly identified the child's dinner as chicken and sweetcorn. Then I had to mop it up.

It's a glamorous job I have.