JULY

Another call, oh well. Never mind, it's a nice day and it's better than being cooped up in an office. Let's get there while waving at the small children who wave at blue lighting ambulances. Hmmm, one of our regulars drunk in the street - still it gives me faith in humanity to know that someone on a bus driving past was concerned enough about their fellow man to call an a ambulance. Let's get him up. Hello Fred, another trip to the hospital? I wonder what drove him to drink, I wonder why he keeps losing hostel places. Its a shame really, wasted lives and all that. Why can't we provide a decent detox programme, I'm sure if we spent the money on him it'd save the NHS in the long run. Oh well, easy enough job - walk on, walk off, no hassle. Time for our next job.

NOVEMBER

A call? Bet it's some bastard pissed in the street. And why is no wanker getting out the way of our ambulance - can't you see big yellow ambulances with blue flashing lights you twat? Oh great, it's Fred, yet another pisshead. Some 'good Samaritan' who didn't actually want to stop to see if the obvious homeless guy is alright. Suppose they'll feel like a hero now calling us out to this waste of space. Blimey, he smells worse than usual - has he been rolling in his own piss? How weak willed do you have to be to get like this - the bottle is never a god idea for solving problems. I bet he gets thrown out of hostels because he takes a dump in their corridors, just like he did to my ambulance yesterday. Pull him up and throw him on the back, off to the hospital while we wait for him to die. Then we et to do it all again once the hospital discharges him.

The trick, of course, is to remain the professional while these different thoughts are rattling around in your head. It gets a bit hard in winter. Actually the hardest part is dragging yourself out of bed to go into work, knowing that these are the sorts of people you'll be spending most of your time with.

It can be awkward trying to hide your feelings when all you want to do is curl up in a corner and sleep.