Things that I have done this week.
- Resisted punching a patient after they became incredibly abusive towards me because the nurses at the hospital decided that they were perfectly suitable to sit out in the waiting room.
- Got a painful back and arm after trying to stop a drunk driver from breaking their neck after they had driven their car, at speed, into the back of a parked car.
- Breathed in aerosolised blood from a patient with a high risk of having a blood-borne disease.
- Dealt with a middle-aged woman who thought that her lifespan had been cut in half after being pushed over by a reversing car. Then wanted us to take her home before taking her to the hospital. She had no injury at all.
- Called the police to someone who was beating his Staffordshire terrier in the street, winding it up and letting it chase young girls.
- Picked up our regular, smelly, occasionally abusive drunk on three separate occasions.
- Had someone cough all over me when I had my face next to their mouth.
- Spent twelve hours sat in the seat of a Mercedes sprinter ambulance feeling my back slowly seize up. Every damn shift.
- Kicked a bucket.
- Had a grand total of three patients thank me when I settled them safely into hospital. That's out of approximately forty patients. Incidentally about the same ratio of patients who actually need an emergency ambulance.
- Inserted one cannulae, gave one dose of Salbutamol, one patient oxygen and argued with one 'carer'. Did not have to engage my brain with anyone or any situation.
And I get to see what happens tonight...
(I'm going to try and follow rule #1)
