I hear what you are saying and have felt that way many times myself. You can help a huge number of people but being unable to help just one makes you question so many things including the worth of your work and the type of society we live in. Some days the only thing that keeps me from despairing is knowing that I cannot help anyone until they recognize that they need help. It doesn't make things better but it does keep me from getting too distracted to see the good things that I have been able to do. As for out of character? Well, I don't think so. You may be a cynical person but if what you describe were out of character you wouldn't be doing what you are doing. Regards, Harry