Hey Tom, I seem to remember that about 7 or 8 years ago, one of your colleagues at Whipps Cross ambulance station was putting together a book, for charity, about all the useless/pointless/waste-of-time calls we've been called to. Don't know what became of it. As for me, off the top of my head, I've been to: Patient singing! Patient who wanted to go to bed - see my post "Time for Bed" Kiddie with an almost imperceptible cut to his finger. (just needed a plaster) Lady with a bent wedding ring (no loss of circulation or sensation) who wanted to be taken to hospital to have the ring cut off. Patient with blisters Elderly gentleman who just wanted to know when his out-patient appointment was going to be. Lady who slipped down her chair - regular caller; 4-5 times daily. Lady who wanted her commode moved nearer the bed. Patient who wanted help to get to the toilet. Elderly lady who wanted a cup of tea - another regular. ..and countless soft tissue injuries of the "you called us for this???" variety. Maybe we should collect some more and publish another book for charity.