I hope when he got to A & E, the staff brought out the longest, thickest needle to inject into the most painful part of his anatomy - his ego! This approach could be adopted for all 'emergency' cases. Oooo....how about including a quick colonic cleanse in the triage? Staff could adopt Dr Gillian McKeith type expressions during and after. I bet very few people would want to go to A & E then. Bloody timewasters.