I hate to disappoint all you guys out there, but..... wait for it......horror of horrors......we lie to you every single day. For example............from patient who has knob stuck in bottle.........."You must think I'm completely stupid?"..........Me: "No, not at all......we see things much worse than this" Or, from wee girlie who's had a frightening amount of alcohol.........."You do believe me don't you, I have only had two drinks tonight......and my drink was definitely spiked......"........Me: "Of course, don't you worry now........now if you'd kindly vomit in the bag next time that'd be great" Or from aged abandoned patient with no family to give a damn and who's had no home care because some nameless, faceless number (sound familiar 24601?) decided it was ok to let them refuse home care, but is now welded to their chair with urine, faeces and discharge from chemical burns from their excrement........."I'm sorry, I must smell dreadful, this must be terrible for you".........Me:"Not at all, don't you worry, its not a problem to us at all, that's what we're here for" Oh, and by the way, I've been to those patients, (I cried over the last one when I came off shift next morning, and again that night when I discovered he'd died.), and no, the last one is neither rare or unusual. He was finally discovered when a neighbour complained about the smell. Thank god for our ability to lie and be insincere convincingly. Its critical to our patient care.