Poor you, you sure have the blues. do you think you might be clinically depressed? I suppose you should try and picture yourself in 10 years time and try to think what you'd like to be doing then. Do you want to stay in the health service? How about something health but private like air ambulance? Or is it going to be a writing career? A period of time abroad? As you have changed career before I'm sure you could do it again. It's a pity you couldn't get a position of influence to sort out the service, or rather the patients! Why do we have to be so nice to them? If only we could educate them we would be helping them more than having them carted off to hospital. Remember the Green Cross Code? The man went all the schools teaching that. Maybe there's a job which combines all your skills- I hope you find it. Your blog followers are behind you mate!