realising that it hasn't worked is a terrible terrible moment. when i've needed treatment for self harm it's always been unpleasant - i couldn't imaging wanting it as attention. being stitched without anasthetic (because "the pain would do me some good" and i "deserved it") while listening to a lecture about the cost of the equipment was a low point. and like someone else said, i always took my own stitches out. follow up's a bit hit and miss. it seems it depended on the attitude of the doctor. the worst - walking 8km home in bare feet at 4 in the morning. the best - after the failed attempt, and a few of the more serious self harm incidents, i was transfered to the phyc unit. there i would be stabalised and arranged good outpatient care. i'm well now and 1 year self harm free.