Yeah. It fair breaks your heart. There's nothing at all that can be said to make it better because it isn't. It really isn't. Hugs help though..........and you have to not allow your mind to go there, because when it does, its just too terrible. I feel myself slipping down that slope sometimes, and at the moment I can find the odd foothold and tree root to hang onto, but sometimes there just aren't any until you get really near the bottom, and then its a long old climb back up again. Thank god for the good jobs where you can reach out and make a difference.